Wednesday, June 5, 2013

This adventure started two and a half years ago.  Our daughter’s friends introduced her to her now husband.   It was a 4H function and I made the new kid work just like all the other kids. I just handed him trash bags and told him to take out trash like the others. Daughter says well now you have met my mom.  He survived.

I did not think he would survive the first trip to the house. He tried to “save her” my husbands horse flipped out and the boy says get back! He had never been around a horse before and thought he would save her.  All he accomplished was to piss her off and she came stomping in from the barn to say he’s gotta go! He is not going to come between me and a horse again.  She is 5’4” and 105 lbs.  Horse is easy 800 lbs. he was young.  Boy is 6’1” and about 150.    So then boy came into house and I said you need to learn a couple things.  NEVER come between her and horse ever again or you will be gone.  She knows horses and she knows what to do.  Her Uncle Joe calls her li’l bit because he saw her punch a 1300 lb horse and tell it to step off and it did.  Now don’t come between her and horse again.  

I will skip to the engagement a year later.  He wanted to propose on New Years Eve. He could not figure out the where and when.   She calls and says hey I am taking the grandkids to the farm and going to go up the hill.  DING DING DING!  The top of the hill is her favorite place at the farm.  He can propose there.  So they take the grandkids up the hill with them for a hike.  The one grand daughter wanted to run back down the hill to chase the horses.  Aunt was saying no and mid NO she turns to see him on knee.  Continuing to yell no at the grand.  Groom always says she told me NO! 

So they came down the hill and she says to her boss who is a jewelry maker.  Look what I found on the hill.  He took it off her finger and promptly ran to his shop with the ring.  We were cracking up because he did not get that she was joking.  He came back with the blue ring and says it’s real!  I wonder who lost it?  She explained and called him blonde.

So at the point of the engagement they new where they would want to get married. It is a military property at a camp ground and there are 13 cabins around it.  So we would wait 5 months to rent the building.  In the mean time we decided that we would rent the cabins too.  This way there would be only us in the area and the grandchildren would be safer.

We waited until 29 May and walked in to rent the building.  We rented it from weds to sun and the cabins weds to Monday morning.  Now the 1 year wait is on.

It was pretty much all left up to me the mom.  She would ask and I would find or I would find and show her something.  Both bride and groom are fulltime college students and have two jobs each.

They both agreed on one thing, they wanted good food.  This means mom cooks. Not a problem at all. We had 3 food handler certified people on site the whole time of cooking and serving.

Over the months we amassed the things we needed to put on a wedding.  Okay we owned most of the stuff already for the catering part of the wedding.

The bride wanted a dress made like this. We bought a dress new from another bride who thought she was a 2 and after baby was not.  The dress we bought was in need of major size alterations and some style changes.  This basically resulted in taking entire dress apart and just using the fabric to build another dress.  Once again this was not a problem because I use to make custom wedding gowns.  Trust me from scratch is so much easier than to take one apart and build a new one.

There were flowers she loved down by the border on the AZ side.  I went on a vacation to see the grands and shipped a box of flowers home.  I came home and made all the bouquets, bouts and corsages.  I was happy to have those done and in a box so early.

We hired a DJ and a photographer a year out.  This way we could get them paid off early too.

I made mad libs for the guests to fill out and some are very funny.

We made candy which tastes like almond bark, dyed it to match her colors of lime and turquoise.

She finally picked her music for the DJ and finally called the organist.

As you probably guessed, I like everything done early she loves to procrastinate.

We got the meat in Jan. It was cryo packed and in a box, we threw it in the freezer.

We ordered chicken from Kroger. Everyone loved it.


I will get down to the week before the wedding.

Our sons x wife was booked on a flight with the grands.  Well it appears they got into a pissing match and she decided not to fly (at our expense) and screw us with the tickets.   Then son called to say he would have come if he was invited.  He forgets he called to find out all flight info etc. months ago when he got the invite.  So their pissing match resulted in neither of them coming.  Oh well that’s on them.

My best friend and her son came on Thursday night 23 May, it was great and I knew she would be lots of help as always.   My mom showed up on 25 May with our friend.   Everyone was coming in early to see the grands that did not fly.  Oh well that one is not on me.  We will not discuss this again until after the wedding.

We laughed for the next few days and did basically nothing for the wedding because it was all done.  I did take time to buy wedding insurance.

Weds 29 May we went to the camp ground to sign into the hall and cabins.  The woman says there is a problem.   Yes you do have a heart attack at this point. One of the cabins had a critter (ground hog)  chew the elect out of it underground.  But you can still have that cabin.  Hummm?  No elect?  Well we will give you two RV’s they are fully elect and shower A/C kitchen etc.   Okay that works great but now I have to figure out who I am putting in those RV’s because I have a family booked for now broken cabin. We had guests from 11 states. We had friends come help us and we could not have done it without them.  My aunt said well I can tell you have worked with those people before.

I pull horse trailer to Hall and they start to unload.  I take other truck back to office to straighten out cabin/rv stuff.   I get there and the guy says you still owe some money.  Yes because two of the cabins occupants are paying today I will just pay for them now it is $460.  He says no it is $1480. Hummm nope! It is $460.   I started pulling piles of receipts out.   The lady says are these all credit card?  I said no some are cash.  She says take the amount she says she owes she has all these receipts.  Come to find out the nice lady that had been taking the money over the past year had been pocketing the cash.  I am so glad I save every piece of paper I ever get.  SAVE YOUR RECEIPTS!

We got checked in and I went home for next load of stuff, this trip would consist of all the bedding, towels etc. for the cabins. We had to provide everything for cabins.  This was not a problem but we just needed to get that to the cabins.  Plus their welcome box.  

While at home my cell phone rings. My brother and family are already heading to the campground.  Another friend was already at campground.  I will be out in 30 min.   Well that 30 soon turned to 2 hours. Some of you may remember a month ago we had to go home to my moms to deal with a flooding situation.  Marseilles Illinois flooded and it was going to flood again. So now comes the fun.  I need to not get my mother all excited and spinning out of control. I need to get someone in the house to remove stuff from the basement.  I try to call my brother who is at the camp ground and there is no signal at the campground.  I get people going to house.   I have my husband get my brother to a place with a signal and he is getting someone to house with a pump. We have people taking care of house in Illinois but are now about 4 hours behind schedule on getting stuff ready at the hall. We get tables set up and are moving.  They have broken into house because no one could find the key.

Weds 29 May. We are having friends come in to cook Navajo tacos.  They can’t get the pans hot enough on the grill to fry so they move inside.  They do not turn on exhaust fan.  It is a little smokey over the stove so I flip on exhaust fan and it is not working.  Sounds like someone threw a bucket of bolts into it.  With that the fire alarms go off.  Evacuate the building.  I just laugh. We put in big fans and exhaust the smoke from the kitchen and they keep cooking.  I already know that the fire trucks are coming from the nearby military post.  I go to call 911 and the phone is not working, I figure I can tell them it is not a fire.  So I finally get a phone that can get a signal out there and walk until it does and call 911 which goes to the county and ask for the military post 911 and tell the lady where I am and she says you have an alarm going off.   Yes Ma’am there is and I just wanted you to know there is no fire. Of course this means they can slow down but does not mean they can stop because they have to physically code the alarm into the box in the building.  They were really great, let us finish cooking.  We gave them to go order of Navajo Tacos and they left. 

We all ate a wonderful dinner and had lots of fun.   That night we set up a few tables and tried to organize some of the decorations in groups on the tables.  Before we left at 11 I put on a crock pot of hash browns, eggs, sausage and cheese. 

Thurs 30 May we had breakfast.  Then the cooking began. We set up more tables and tried to organize ourselves.  All the young kids were just great. They played at the playground. They played badmitten and bags.  

The adult MOH had to take a test for college.  So they came to the house to use the computer and waitied for the roses from Costco to arrive.

The flowers arrived and I got them all prepped and today 6/5 they are still beautiful.

Thursday night we had a TX BBQ.  Our good friend and saddle man came to cook for us.  We had grillin strips.  Obama turkeys (Cornish game hens), fajitas, OOPs I forgot the sweet potato fire.  I put them on the grill.  I normally wrap them twice.  Well I told someone else how to wrap them.  I forgot the twice part.  The butter ran out and caused a huge fire.  My nephew came to say aunt there is a fire.  I went running.  I wear a knee brace with a bar in it.  I ran and got food moved and fire out.  Put them in a pan and let them cook on the other side.  I walked by my aunt and she says I like mine well done please.  I said I am working on the other side now.      

Anyway we had a wonderful meal.  I mean a omg I am stuffed meal for the second night.

Friday we set up for the wedding and finished cooking.  I am not saying this were not confusing or not insane. But it was all managed as usual.

Friday night was the rehearsal.  I had ordered early and my best friend went to pick up.  We had salads  and broiled chicken for the celiac person and pizzas and soda.   Our friend from TX made peach cobbler too.    I get a call once my family gets back to the hall and they say the cake looks like shit, the humidity was killing it.  I got back and mended cake and the fondant was still sagging.  I put it back in place and put it in the freezer until the cake cutting the next day.

Saturday was a little insane.  The bride, her adult MOH, two little MOH and myself came back to the house to get ready and all of us dressed but the bride. It was POURING.  I mean hella rain! Thank God I had ordered 12 turquoise 60” umbrellas and that they came in on time.

We escaped the house via the garage so we could just open the back of the vehicle and throw the wedding gown in and keep it dry. Of course I had ordered a huge gown bag for it months ago.

We got to the church and I found in a box in the vehicle. The knives for the cake.  The markers for the bench.  So they were sent back to venue right after wedding.   

Instead of a guest book we used a wooden bench with the wrought iron legs and back.  We had people sign it in black perm marker and I will put a few coats of poly over it so the signatures wont wear off.

For the silverware and napkin I sealed a plain white envelope then cut off the end of the envelope. Then I put a piece of double sided tape on the front and put a package of wild flower seeds on it.  Slid in the napkin and the fork and knife.   We put these are each seat because I hate to carry silverware from a buffet.  Under  each envelope we put the mad lib and then pens were on the tables.

At the church before the wedding the photographers took the bride outside with those turquoise umbrellas to take some pics.  We got the men dressed and their ties on. 

I had taken my grandmas rosary that was given to me years ago.  I tied to it my dads wedding ring, my grandmas wedding ring.  My other grandmas wedding ring (one the bride was using for her wedding ring). My sons cross he use to wear. Our friends guardian angel pin and the heart pendant that the brides great grandpa had made out of the window of a B29 bomber when he was in the war for great grandma for their wedding day.   This was our nod to the people who had passed away.    I told the photographer what all these pieces were and then it came time to put it on the bouquet and let the bride see it.   It was the one moment that she was about to cry.  I had to walk away and get my tissue.  It was really hard for us not having her brother there.   Not to mention the one who chose not to be there.

The grooms brother showed up at the wedding, I touched his arm and said thank you for coming and he yanked it away.  On the way out I asked if he was coming to reception and he was NOT COMING!!! Douche bag!  Shocked really that he even showed up at all.  Long back story there.

Wedding was beautiful. The bride was happy in her boots.

All the way between church and reception venue I prayed to every deceased family member and God to stop the rain. We got to the venue and it was raining!   As the bride and groom arrived the rain stopped and stayed clear the rest of the night.  Thank you God and family!

We had hired a lady from church and her two daughters to set the buffet and keep it full. They ROCKED!!!

We had the DJ from 3-7 and he knew he would play later as long as we said okay.  The grandchildren were having so much fun.  When it came time for the 7 o’clock hour I said oh yes.  At 8 he came to me again and I turned to 9 yr old grand daughter and she says yes play.  Next hour I asked 8 yr old grand daughter and she says keep playing,  next hour I asked 7 yr old grand daughter and so on.  He was cracking up that I did not care about the cost.  No the kids are having fun so let them.   I am sure they all slept all night.

It was 11 and the DJ was taking down his stuff. He was paid.  And we were on clean up. We got the tables stripped except two that held all the candles etc.   and 3 tables for breakfast on Sunday. 

So off to bed at 12 and up at 0630.  This is my normal up time so it was no different than a day on the farm other than no poop to shovel.  I was up and cooking before anyone was there.  We had pancakes, sausage biscut rolls, omlet in a bag, tortillas fresh cooked, milk, coffee, fruit, biscuts,  apple butter, jelly.  Everyone had a great time. All the people that stayed in the cabins ate and all the people in the hotel  came to eat.  

Now it was time for the real clean up and time to bring in the horse trailer to get the stuff out.  We had so much food left over.  We gave some to friends who were helping us and froze a lot.  So we have stuff to eat for a long time.

The things that we did not do.   I did not use those nice containers to make lemonade or tea.  So those are left overs too.

I decided to sell all catering stuff once this was over.  I keep saying I am going to put 1000 votives and tall candle holders, table cloths, EVERYTHING on craigslist.  Of course my mother chimed in that was not safe.  So my bestie keeps saying yes she is going to put them on craigs list but only meet the people in a dark alley.   We just crack up.

I am sure there is something I forgot.

Ahhh the menu.   Cake white for them to cut.   Cakes lemon, chocolate, carrot, brownies.   Food for reception.  10 different kinds of dips.  Ranging  from  mild to owie.  Fried chicken, roasted chicken, top round, broccoli salad, cole slaw, pasta salad, potato salad, baked beans, pea salad, fruit salad.  Our friends thought it was prime rib and they own a restaurant.  I was happy everyone liked the food.  We kept the buffet full the entire night.

I must add that RSVP's are a turkey shoot.

On Sunday we took 16 people out for German Food. We wanted to do this as a thank you for all their help and for them coming to the wedding.  They were the only ones that stayed until Monday or longer.

1 comment:

  1. I forgot to add that they had emergency repair come in for the exhaust fan. It was birds nest. But I could not cook until he was done with the repair. The fire laws.